After obviously seeing the blank look on my face, he continued.. What are the things that you must do to reach your goal? Eg if your goal is to walk Everest, you would need to have done some training, bought some equipment in preparation for it, booked flights, etc.
My goal at the time was to be a size 12, to buy clothes in a normal sized clothing store, and to be seen as someone worth taking on a date... So I remember thinking, okay, well I'd need a great pair of stilettos. But I think he was looking for something a little more health related. :)
After a little more thought, my list was as follows:
drink more water
Prepare for the week in advance.
That was it. And so I began. And here I am now, a couple of years down the track, telling the tale of success, at that time seemed unobtainable.
What has got me thinking about all of this is, I have just been in contact with a gorgeous young lady, with a pretty face, a kind heart and a lot of weight to loose. I mean a real lot. I wanna help this person, she has been an acquaintance of mine for many many years, and is too valuable a person to see fall by the wayside. She has a beautiful family and works hard for her lifestyle.
Together, you and me and this gorgeous lady, we are gonna do this. We are gonna all get fit, get healthy and get happy. Leave our emotional baggage behind, starting today. Forgive those we need to, forget those we need to, and move forward with the rest of our lives. Starting now.
Loosing weight is easy, once you get your head into the game.. It's not your body that betrays you, it's your head. So, get that thinking right, and the rest is easy. Allow me to outline quickly, what we have been through before on this blog, for my friend who hasn't read all of it yet..
SMART goal.. Written down. In positive terms. Do not write I want to loose 10kg, write "I am now 65 kg and feeling fabulous" (or what ever your current weight is minus what you want to loose.)
I am happy if you do in small increments, eg 20 kg at a time, rather than scare yourself and say 80 kgs straight up!
Write when this will occur.. One month, end of year whatever, but it must have a date.
Make sure the goal is achievable, please don't set yourself up for failure straight up with a goal that cannot possibly be attained. Make sure the goal is realistic.
Make sure your goal is timely, or tangible which ever you prefer.. Ensure you have given yourself enough time to reach the goal.. Or as I prefer,T for tangible.. When I can see or feel the results occurring is when I get excited.
As an example- you could write... At the eve of Jims wedding on August 6th 2014, I am 65kg of healthy, fit muscle. I can see myself glowing with vitality and good health. I am surrounded by my family, who are all healthy and happy. All my exercise and healthy eating is paying off, I am feeling and looking fantastic in my new size 12 dress.
Step two: okay goals are set - now how do you get there. Think about how you will move more, eat better, sleep better, eliminate stress in your world. I have a theory ( yep, another one) that weight collected over the years could easily be attributed to emotional baggage, which may or may not be yours. Have a good long think, about any resentments you are harbouring, and old relationships that still annoy you, and let them go. If it doesn't have a place in your current life, leave it behind. Visualise unpacking the weight on your hips into a suitcase and walking away. Pack those old hurts, personal heartbreaks into a box, shut it, tape it up and put it in the mailbox. Attach it to a balloon and visualise it floating away. Just Let it go.
Not only will you feel better you may also feel a lot lighter as well, figuratively speaking.
List what gym classes you are going to take, find an accountability partner if you need, make a timetable up, have a gym bag packed etc etc.
Nows the time to really think about what you eat- and be really honest. Think about what you are going to eliminate from your pantry to help you achieve this goal.
Spend Sunday nights writing your food plan or ideas for the week, cook ahead if you are time poor. Do the shopping when you are not in a rush, stressed or hungry. Write an exercise plan for the week. Get the money ready in a wallet in your gym bag. Be organised. Prepare for success.
Step three: stop weighing yourself. In the days when I ate bread, I could gain up to 3 kgs overnight, just eating two slices of bread. I used to get so down on myself, get sad, eat chocolate. I now weigh prob once a month, just to see how I'm travelling, but really the best sign is your clothes. Pick an outfit that is just a little snug, and keep it for trying on once a week or fortnight. That gives you much more satisfaction that those bloody things laying on the bathroom floor that really only measure your relationship with gravity, on any given day.
Step four: minimise all carbohydrates, eliminate as much processed food and preservatives as you can. DO NOT drink diet Coke etc. it's poison. It is assisting you in keeping you overweight. It's crap. You wouldn't drink Roundup, so don't drink Diet Softdrink. Eat as much fresh foods as you can. Google paleo recipes. Our family has never eaten so well as we do now. I never feel like I am missing out on anything. Now, when I buy our meat for dinner, I buy what's on special, go home and google a recipe that matches. Eg paleo recipe with chicken thighs. It's so simple. You have no excuses to eat boring food every again. It's so much fun!
Step five: Exercise . A lot. Mix it up. Trick your body everyday, never let it get complacent.
I know someone who has walked around "Jenny Craig Straight" for 20 years at 5 am but still struggles with her weight. Why? Because her body is used to it, it's just part and parcel of her everyday existence, and the body allows for it. She would loose so much weight if she spent that same time doing different exercise, but she is comfortable in that mindset, and won't change. Her loss, or not, as it happens.
Doing cardio is great for fitness, but not real good for weight loss. If you want to loose weight and make a positive change in your body quickly, join a gym and get into weight resistance training. Google easy exercise to start, or get a PT in the gym to show you what to do to begin with. Increase intensity as you get fitter. There is a lady in my gym class that has a tshirt that says " running in a treadmill will get you nowhere" which is true on more than one level.
Step Six: eliminate the temptations in your world. This one is a little tricky and may take a lot of work. Not buying the wrong food at the shops is easy, it's changing your lifestyle that's hard. Does your social life resolve around alcohol and too much of the wrong food? Do you have friends that are happy with the way you are, and would probably be annoyed ( read jealous) if you made positive change?
I learned the hard way, that some people like you to be overweight and unhappy, not very self confident. And they will go to extraordinary lengths to keep you like that.. Sabotage sound familiar to anyone?
You really need to move these people out of your social sphere. There is a saying that goes, "you are the average of the 5 people you most hang around". Hmm food for thought right there.. Are the 5 people you most hang around, a positive influence on you, supportive, helpful?
It was about this time, that I started realising I had a sabotager in my midst, someone who benefitted by having me large, unattractive, unhappy, reliant. It was also around this time I started reading every self help book I could lay my hands on. Louise Hay, "you can heal your life" is a ripper.
Make friends with people in your gym class, the lady you see each morning on your walk, the lady over the road who like gardening like you. Anyone who has that 'we can do it" attitude. Change your Friday night drinks from the pub to a game of squash. Make a night indoor cricket team. You get the idea.
So, These are the basics of starting a weight loss plan of attack. A fitness goal. A plan to live as long and as productive life as you can. Write your list of non negotiables. What are you going to do each and every day to make positive change in your world? Then just do it.
Think about all of the things that you can do when you achieve this. How good you will feel, how happy and healthy you will be. How proud your kids will be of your achievements.
Then think of the things that you won't be ale to do in the future, if you don't start now.
Change your thoughts and you can change the world. Trust me.